Aging Sucks – ‘Cause as Soon as You’re Born, You’re Dying

Yeah, I’m quoting Iron Maiden. For you young ’uns out there, Iron Maiden is a British heavy metal band that rose to prominence in the 80s. The lyric quoted is from their 1988 album, Seventh Son of a Seventh son.

Yes, I’m quoting lyrics from 1988. What can I say? I’m a bald, middle aged head banger, blabbering on about getting old.

So, anyway, yesterday I said that aging sucks and I stand by that.

Further, it sucks no matter how old you are when you start doing it:

‘Cause as soon as you’re born, you’re dying

Now, that line really isn’t true. It’s actually around the age of 25 that you start dying, that’s when your body’s rate of new cell production drops below its rate of old cells dying.

Aside: A professional hockey player’s peak years are his 25 and 26 year old seasons, although I suppose that could be a coincidence.

I suppose.


Anyway, this weekend’s contemplation of my own bouts with Father Time was interrupted by my wife’s cousin, who had pulled something in her lower back. She was:

  • In intense pain
  • Hobbling around like an old lady with severe arthritis
  • Popping Alleve like they were candy mints
  • Applying Voltaren to her back
  • Lying on a heated pad for relief

Does any of this sound familiar? It certainly did to me, and I may have even told the story already. Long story short, one day eight years ago I was playing with my boys and something in my back went, “click,” and I spent the next week doing, well, the list above.

In my defence, I was well into my 40s, and had spent my youth in activities which are, well, not exactly spine healthy. Thing is, my wife’s cousin is 32.

Now, you may think 32 is a little young to be having debilitating back problems, but it really isn’t. I’ve spilled a great many pixels over the last couple of years expounding the notion that modern society is a grand conspiracy to ruin our spines, and our postures.

It isn’t, really, but it does seem that way sometimes.

Anyway, you can’t beat Father Time, in the end, he gets us all. But you can do a few things to keep him at bay. I might have even written about some of them.

And finally, the thing that first got me to writing this little blog,

  • Pay attention to your spinal health

Aging sucks and I can’t help but think that it sucks even more when you’re still in your 30s, yet hobbled with an old man’s complaint. So as to your aging, as with your stress, do something about it.